• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About
  • Meet the Relationship Experts
  • Contribute
  • Contact Us

Love Engineer

Dating Advice & Relationship Advice for Men and Women

  • Advice for Men
  • Advice for Women
  • Dealing with Breakups
  • Marriage Advice
  • Recommended Relationship Books
    • Books on Dating
    • Books for Couples Thinking of Marriage
    • Books on Intimacy Issues

Healthy & Unhealthy Boundaries in Relationships: Where do you fit in?

By Carisa Carlton

Unhealthy BoundriesWhether the relationships are with children, co-workers, lovers, strangers, or friends, boundaries are self-empowering and confidence boosting. Boundaries can help you stay sane when everything around you is radioactive.

What are Boundaries?

Boundaries are a line you draw that marks the limits of your behavior and the behavior you will tolerate. Boundaries can be a good thing, but some boundaries are unhealthy. View the chart below for a self assessment of your boundaries — are they healthy or could you use a bit of self empowerment?

Boundaries and Your Children

The boundaries you set with your children will leave a life-long impact on their characters. Boundaries affect children’s values, work ethic, the friends they choose, and even who they marry. Good parenting involves setting boundaries, and correctional consequences.

Boundaries and Successful Relationships

Healthy and Unhealthy Boundaries
Healthy and Unhealthy Boundaries

Individuals with clearly defined sense of boundaries will have a better sense of his/her identity, and an understanding of their self worth. Engaging in the process of an ongoing relationship that functions smoothly involves healthy boundaries that support and enhance the other person. In order to communicate clearly, we need a strong sense of self. Without boundaries, you will never gain critical self-worth and empowerment necessary for a long-lasting, healthy, respectful relationship. When we have a strong sense of our self value, we can appreciate and respect qualities in our partner. When two people who come together with a clear definition of their boundaries, the potential for intimacy and commitment is great. Differences can then be used as an instrument for growth, excitement, and alluring mystery.

In the past, I let some ill-willed individuals define me, and the same damaged my self-esteem to the detriment of everyone around me. Now, I more easily recognize when the other party has the boundary issues!

Boundaries are an ongoing topic I will continue addressing through various articles. Your contribution and thoughts are an important part of building a strong community with healthy boundaries. What are the boundary issues that stand out as important or ridiculous to you?

More Relationship Advice

  • Five Ways to Create and Maintain Stability In Relationships with BPD PartnersFive Ways to Create and Maintain Stability In Relationships with BPD Partners
  • Advice – Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)Advice – Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
  • Borderline Personality Disorders and Relationships – Alluring Yet VolatileBorderline Personality Disorders and Relationships – Alluring Yet Volatile
  • Internet Dating Irks – The Frustrations of Online DatingInternet Dating Irks – The Frustrations of Online Dating
  • Learn How To Choose a Better Partner For You.Learn How To Choose a Better Partner For You.
  • Masculine Woman, Feminine Man You Need to Choose. Do You Want to be The Girl or The Guy In Your Future Relationship?Masculine Woman, Feminine Man You Need to Choose. Do You Want to be The Girl or The Guy In Your Future Relationship?

Filed Under: Carisa Carlton Tagged With: Borderline Personalities

About Carisa Carlton

Carisa Carlton (carisacarlton.com) While most people look at life’s straight lines, its height and depth and width, she’s bending the lines with her imagination and turning black and white into shades of blue and yellow. She can, if she must, think in conventional ways. But left on her own, she’ll usually opt for the eccentric or avant-garde. “Do you ever stop thinking,” is the question most frequently posed to the artist and writer. Located in Orange County, California, Carisa spends her days shuffling words, brainstorming, researching, and dreaming of new ways to shape our culture. Connect with Carisa on Google+

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Marilyn Rosen says

    August 3, 2019 at 9:29 pm

    Hi Carisa,
    I have a question, but first I’ll give you the backstory but hopefully short. I had to tell the minister of the Bible study group I attend that I can’t help out once a month with serving mission meals to under employed people. I have a 6yr old son whom I homeschool, a husband who works odd hours and I’m a tutor.
    I had to tell the group that I can’t help once a month, that it’s too much for me. They expect us to shop, cook and deliver the meal which can get expensive. When I told them my situation, the minister got all upset about it and basically wrote in a text that either anyone who goes to her study is either all in, or out. All in meaning you have to serve and participate in things they want you to. I’m putting my boundaries in place with that group and leaving. I want to know, is this the right thing?

    Thank you

    Marilyn

  2. Courtney says

    October 5, 2019 at 2:16 am

    Marilyn,
    Yes. That’s 100% the right thing to do

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Related Articles

  • Five Ways to Create and Maintain Stability In Relationships with BPD Partners
  • Advice - Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
  • Borderline Personality Disorders and Relationships – Alluring Yet Volatile

Top Relationship & Dating Tips

  • The Do’s and Don’ts of Dating an Engineer.
  • What You Didn’t Want To Hear About Cheating & Relationships – The Hard Stats
  • What Do You Do When the ONE You Wanted Marries Someone Else?
  • Advice – Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
  • Understanding How to Fight Fair When Relationships Have Tense Moments
  • What To Do When You’re Feeling Taken For Granted

Footer

About Love Engineer

  • About : Love Engineer
  • Masthead

Legals

  • Terms of Service
  • Privacy Policy

Follow Love Engineer

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Copyright Love Engineer a Relationship and Dating Advice Website