The Dangers of Instant Chemistry in Dating
Instant chemistry blows away our best interest sometimes – it messes with our “man-picker” and it works against us. In other words, people often choose chemistry over the whole package.
Chemistry alters our perception and causes us to attach meaning to things that are often inaccurate. For example, if you feel instant chemistry with a man, you may assume that he’s available and that he wants to be in a relationship – the same kind of relationship that YOU want.
This can lead you down the path of creating a whole fantasy in your mind about someone who you know very little about.
Have you ever found yourself obsessing over why a man isn’t calling? Ever analyzed why a man hasn’t followed up after a date? Do you replay conversations over and over in your head, wondering what you could have said differently or done better?
If he’s not paying attention to you, rather than making you want to move towards him – what if his lack of masculine action toward you TURNED YOU OFF? What if it caused you to get bored and lose interest?
What if you could hook up chemistry to when he’s acting loving and wonderful – and moving towards you? The good news is – YOU CAN! I know you can.
You can save yourself from SO much anxiety by simply becoming an observer of what a man DOES.
Men are very simple – they do what they WANT to do, ALL the time. If they’re attracted to you and interested in a relationship, they’ll contact you and ask you out. If they’re not into you or not looking for a relationship, they won’t.
In other words, nothing means ANYTHING unless he’s actively pursuing you. Stop attaching meaning to the chemistry you feel for a man unless he’s showing you with his ACTIONS that he wants to move things forward. This will make things SO much simpler for you!
Reading into everything a man says or trying to “figure him out” is a useless waste of your time and energy. It also creates a whole vibe around you that a man can FEEL – it does the OPPOSITE of attract him, it pushes him away!
You can take all that energy you’ve been using to try to figure him out and use that energy to make YOURSELF happy and create an amazing life for yourself! This will shift your vibe and turn you into a MAGNET for men.
Unlike the superficial kind of “instant chemistry” that makes you feel off-balance, REAL chemistry is something that develops over time – when you build intimacy with someone and feel SAFE with them.
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As a Certified Life and Relationship Coach with a masters degree in Psychology from Pepperdine University – and a Master Coach Teacher for Rori Raye – Helena understands the challenges of balancing the masculine energies used in work with the feminine energies necessary for success in dating and relationships. Helena helps women all over the world turn their relationship patterns around so they can attract more love into their lives. Whether you’re recently single or you’ve been single for years – or you’re in a relationship that seems to be going nowhere – Helena can help you quickly and permanently turn your love life around. For more free dating and relationship advice, visit helenahartcoaching.com. You can instantly download your FREE eBook copy of “3 Keys To Attract The Man You Want”and book a FREE 30-minute coaching session with Helena through her website.
REALLY DUMB ADVICE. If your picker is BROKEN that’s one thing… Get some help!
Don’t tell people NOT to listen to their instincts. Ridiculous.