How To Spot The Classic Case Of Bad Dates

There is nothing wrong with online dating, no matter what anyone tells you. In fact, more and more people are becoming used to the idea that the Internet is just another way to meet people who have the potential of being your life partner.


In this fast-paced environment, people just ca not be expected to dance around and be coy. Online dating sites have made your job easier in finding someone you may already have something in common with, eliminates the clumsy beginnings of a pick-up lines, and also weeds out potential crazies from your list.


Still, you can never be too careful. While online dating sites can do you the favor letting you choose people you date according to the information they provided, you have to remember that there are always a lot of things eliminated from that list. Be aware that, like any other dating situation, there can be hits and there can be misses you just have to know which one is which.


Here are some dating tips: First, pick out the narcissist. He is the person you talks on and on about himself, his job, his potentials, his greatness…and if he does ask about you, it all ends up with himself again. This guy can be a great bore, plus he does not need you as a date, he just needs to date himself. It should not be too easy to ditch this guy, but he may be just too in love with himself that he wont think that he is doing anything wrong. Cut the date short if he invites you anywhere else. More importantly, make it firm and succinct that you wont want to date him again. It lets you break off easily, and also gives him the idea that if he missed this one coming, then he must have done something wrong hopefully letting him realize it.


Busy people may mean they are doing something really important, but establishing a connection should not be too hard. If your potential date keeps answering their phone calls, or keeps whipping out their mobiles to text replies to someone else, then do not bother. Unless he is a doctor or an important political figure like the governor of the state, then there is no excuse. Being with you means he should be committed to at least showing you a good time, so if he ca not even give that, what are the chances he will give you his full attention when you need it in the future? Save yourself the heartbreak and just walk away. Chances are, he wont even notice.


Finally, just because you are single does not mean you are not into the potential of staying that way. Dating can be a way for you to enjoy yourself, find other singles out there willing to be with you. It does not have to be a world-changing experience, but you do not have to stay with a bad date that is steadily becoming worse.


If he has several and by that, we mean numerous unforgivable characteristics, try to list in your head if you are willing to settle. No movies you have in common, no sense of humor, nothing to tie you to that moment instead of letting your imagination fly while he is talking, then there is no point. You do not have to be loaded with dating advices to know that this one just is not going to cut it. If he calls, be polite and thank him for the nice time, but do not try to encourage him anymore. Do not trust those romantic comedy movies. There is always the chance he is better than you thought he would be, but not seeing it during the first few dates may and you are not seeing the relationship going anywhere, then it is likely not going to.


It is not a fool-proof list, and bad dates can always arm themselves with different disguises, but if you learn how to judge your reactions and read their interest on you, then you will not end up wasting your time. Dating requires that you actually enjoy it enough to want to see that person again. Being single can be fun, but it is always better if you enjoy it with someone else and not simply bemoaning the fact while on a bad date.

Rodrigo Rehn is a Relationships Expert, Linux Systems Administrator, Web Programmer, PHP Developer and CEO of FaceRomance online dating for singles.

Divorcing a Narcissist

Going through the process of a divorce is not easy, and rarely pleasant. It is a huge loss to be dealt with emotionally, and there are many practical considerations to be managed as well. There are issues surrounding the loss of an ideal picture of marriage and family, the breaking of a commitment, the loss of the intimate relationship you once shared with your spouse, financial issues, living arrangements, the impact on mutual friends and family members, and of course the effects on your children. Unfortunately, if your spouse is a narcissist, these issues can become even more contentious and difficult to settle.

Chances are, you are getting a divorce because your partner continually commits bewildering, confusing, and destructive acts. When the divorce becomes a reality, it is likely that the gloves will come all the way off and you will experience even more hurtful behavior. Lacking in empathy, and not receiving the accustomed “narcissistic supply,” (admiration and attention) from you anymore, you might be discarded as worthless to the narcissist and any fa?e that your spouse put up to keep you in the relationship may drop. It is important to stay as collected as possible in this situation, and stay as focused and unengaged emotionally with your spouse as possible. He or she is not the person to go to for help or emotional support. Here are 4 practical tips for leaving the narcissist successfully:

1. Cover your legal bases and do it soon. Anytime there is property, significant assets, and/or children involved, an attorney is very important. Enlist the services of an attorney who you feel safe and secure with, and who understands the dynamics of a potentially “high conflict” situation, as well as a thorough understanding of more peaceful alternatives like mediation. If the attorney glazes over or dismisses you when you bring up narcissism, find another attorney to work with.

2. Make some immediate financial preparations. In the short term, make sure you have access to money. Get a credit card in your own name, while your credit is still combined with your spouse’s. Open a bank account in your name as well, and stash some emergency funds in it, just in case. Court orders are designed to protect you from having your access to funds blocked by a spouse, but it is always wise to expect that your partner may not “play by rules.” Make copies of all financial records and information ? tax returns, W-2′s, paystubs, loan information, insurance policies, employee reimbursement accounts, mileage plans, car titles, property appraisals, bank statements, credit card statements, 401K statements, investment statements, and the like. Your attorney can give you a complete list of all documents needed. See a financial planner for advice about settlements and future outcomes.

3. Log and document everything ? times, dates, and events. Record all the immoral, unethical, illegal, and destructive acts your spouse commits. This is particularly important if you live somewhere where there is fault assigned to divorce, or if you have child custody issues. If you have concerns for your children’s safety with your narcissistic spouse and he or she doesn’t agree to your custody terms, you might want to ask for a custody or parenting time evaluation. These can take many months so be sure to request it right away if it is necessary.

4. Avoid interacting with your narcissistic spouse, except as absolutely necessary. Avoid personal conversations, or assimilating his or her criticisms or manipulations of you. Remember, it is likely your spouse will try to belittle, dumbfound, or cause you to question your perception of reality. Be careful what information you share, keeping in mind it may all be used against you later.

Are you interested in addressing the challenge of divorce from a holistic standpoint?


For a free copy of my ebook, “Natural Methods To Fight Depression”, click here: http://www.stoptoxicrelationships.com/gifts-naturalmethodstofightdepression.html


Shannon Cook is a personal coach and resource guide.