Dating After Divorce – Tips To Getting Back Out In The Dating World After Divorce

Dating after divorce can be intimidating. For some people, it may be a few decades since you’ve been out there in the dating scene. As a divorce coach and author, a big concern my clients have is what to do to ensure they have more success in their future relationships.

Here are some important tips to get you successfully back into the dating world and on the road to successful, loving relationships.

1. Date Yourself First

The best predictor of the relationships you’ll have with romantic partners is the kind of relationship you have with yourself. Date yourself first and take some time to get your feet back on the ground. Give yourself the kind of love and appreciation you’d like to have in a future partner. Light a candle for dinner, buy yourself some flowers, and tell yourself how gorgeous you look in the morning.

2. Beware the Rebound Relationship

Take your first relationship out of the gate with a grain of salt. Think of the first relationship after divorce like training wheels on a bicycle. It helps you get back in the game, but may not be something you want to keep in the long run. Beware if you’re the first relationship for your new partner as well.

3. Get Clear on What You’re Looking For

From your divorce experience, you probably have a clear picture of the characteristics, behaviors and attitudes that DON’T work for you. Write them each down and then ask what you do want. For example, instead of self-centered or unfaithful, you may want to list caring and loyal as qualities you’d like your date to have. Put your focus on the positive qualities and use them as a yardstick to decide who to date or not.

4. Keep Your Ex-partner Out Your Future Relationships

Do you find yourself endlessly talking about your ex, or comparing your new partner to your old? Stop and get honest about whether you’re really ready to date again. Sharing about past relationships as information is fine. Endlessly psychoanalyzing and complaining is not, plus it’s a big turn-off.

If you’re divorced, why are you allowing this person to consume so much of your time and attention? Find someone like a trusted friend, divorce coach or therapist to help you work out your unresolved feelings.

5. Do Something Each Week That Scares You

Divorce is an opportunity to not only rebuild, but reinvent your life. And that can feel scary! It’s important to expand your comfort zone. Do something each week (or even each day) that scares you or stretches you. Check out a new class you’ve been interested in or go to a singles mixer. If you feel your fear coming up, welcome it as a sign that you are stretching your comfort zone and are on the right track.

Success Strategist, coach and best-selling author, Carolyn B. Ellis, is the founder of ThriveAfterDivorce.com, created for divorced people who want to stop struggling and start thriving. To get free tips on every aspect of living through a divorce, from legal issues to single parenting to getting back into the dating world, visit www.ThriveAfterDivorce.com.

Are you Ready to Date Again? How About Trying an Online Dating Site


Using an online dating site to get your feet wet again in regards to the dating and mating scene can be a great way for lots of people to plunge back into the waters of love.

How you know you are ready to date again?

The amount of time that passes before you are ready to date again can depend a lot on how your past relationship ended. You may be a widow, divorced or recently ended a long term relationship. If your relationship did not end in death, you may need to examine some of the reasons that the relationship failed and what role you played in its demise.

Using an online dating site can be a great way to reach out and meet new people in your area and beyond. You can use an online dating site to find someone you want to settle down with, or to find some good company to go out and see a movie with and have a good time. When you have done a little self reflection, and know what you are looking for in an online dating site, you may be ready to go and test the waters.

When you have stopped putting yourself down in ways like “I’ll never get married” or “Why would anyone think I’m attractive,” it may be time for you to date again. When you have negative thoughts and feelings about yourself, this will communicate to prospective dates whether in person or on an online dating site. Positive attracts positive and that may be what just what the doctor ordered for you in a new mate.

Benefits of using an online dating site

You might not be the type of person into the club and bar scene, so where will you meet prospective partners? Using an online dating site allows you to search for that special someone without standing around and feeling like you are being judged. An online dating site can allow you to get to know a person before committing to a date in ways that communicating face to face doesn’t permit. Many times when you meet someone on an online dating site you will share things of a more intimate nature than had you met in person. Using a service online may introduce you to the person of your dreams if you give it a chance.

Have you been reluctant to get back into the dating game because you aren?t ready to face the many desperate people you usually encounter when you visit a bar or a nightclub? Visit Online Dating Site now to find the perfect match to enjoy walks, dinner or active events. You never know when you might fall madly in love for life when you give yourself a chance to meet someone new.

Romantic Proposal Ideas: 3 Romantic Ways to Sweep Her Off Her Feet With Your Proposal

Youâ??ve already bought the ring. You already have the girl. Now, all you need is the perfect proposal to go with it. Since this is a very special occasion, you have to make it memorable for both you and your future wife. Wifeâ?¦ It has a nice ring to it, doesnâ??t it? Well, that isâ?¦ if she says, â??I do.â? To make sure this happens, Iâ??d like to give you the most romantic proposal ideas to sweep her feet away.

Women might come in different shapes, sizes and color, but all of them deserve to be treated to the best wedding proposal their partners could ever give. And with these romantic proposal ideas, thereâ??s no way your bride-to-be can ever resist your charm.

1) Bring out the big guns.

If you can afford a lavish lifestyle, then thereâ??s certainly no reason to hold back on your wedding proposal. With your money, you can pursue the grander gestures of affection. You can whisk your girlfriend away to Parisâ??the most romantic city in the worldâ??or take her for a trip to Italy.

These ideas might sound stereotypical at first; but the truth is, not everyone gets to experience something this romantic.

Hereâ??s a tip. Once you get there, try engaging in ordinary activities like having coffee or taking a stroll down the street. Then, in the middle of the square or plaza, go ahead and pop your question. Trust me, the Parisian backdrop, a bended knee and a ring is all you need to make that moment one of the most memorable in her life.

2) Compose letters of love.

Our romantic proposal ideas donâ??t always have to be expensive. If youâ??re pressed for cash, why donâ??t you try writing her a series of love letters?

These days, hardly anybody writes love letters anymore. This makes your proposal all the more romantic and special.

You can write a series of letters composed of one or two lines, or maybe even a poem about love.  You can leave these letters lying around for her to discover.

One would lead to another until she reaches the final letter, which directs her to you with ring on one hand and a proposal in the other.

3) Take a trip down memory lane.

Where was your first kiss? Where did you first meet? One of the most personal romantic proposal ideas is re-creating a special moment from your past.

For example, if you two met in the park while walking dogs, you can try and bring her back to that same place for your proposal.

Or if you two shared your first kiss by the beach, itâ??s a great idea to return there and share a quiet evening together. Then, while watching the waves roll, you can begin easing into your proposal by talking about how you two first kissed in that same spot.

Romantic proposal ideas can be as fun, or as serious, as you want it to be. Thereâ??s no need to change who you are or exhaust your bank account just to be able to give her the most memorable proposal ever. All you need to remember is that you want to spend the rest of your life with this person. That alone is enough to make everything romantic and perfect.

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