Leave Your Baggage At Home When Looking For A Date!

With legion of single men and women out there, I am always amazed at how some of us behave when it comes to selecting and then meeting a partner for the first time. It doesn’t matter whether you found your possible match online, or through work, friends or whatever, it never fails.

I am of course ranting about the pre-conceived ideas that we, singles seemingly always bring to the dating table. And there again it is true for divorced people, those single souls that were once in a relationship and having to do it all over again, and true also for the never married, the eternal spinsters, men or women even though I am aware that by definition, the word spinster applies to a woman who has never married!

Habits forged over a life time are always difficult to dismiss. After all we are creatures of habits. They guide us through our lives, make us feel better; determine whom we are and how we live.

But according to a recent poll, a staggering 30 pc of American adults are singles, some having never been married before. Staggering as these figures are, one thing they indicated that as far as our dating habits are concerned, we may very well be embarked on the wrong path. They have not brought us any luck so far in our attempts to find relationship and romance, and in all likelihood, they will not bring us any more success in the future.

It seems evident then that we ought to re-visit our preconceived ideas about who we are really, and the partners we are looking for. Let’s not be afraid of learning from past mistakes. Our expectations, our assessment of the men and women we are and want to meet, all these need to be looked at more carefully.

When searching through profiles after profiles, I am often amazed at the apparent perfection these single men and women have achieved in their lives. Men and women want it all. The looks, the attraction, the immediate and sudden physical pull, the successful career, the house in the city and a vacation home elsewhere, the need for independence coinciding with a search for an equal provider, the whole package.

They take one look at your profile and make a decision there and there based on a couple of photos and statements on a web site page, which may, or may not reflect exactly what the person really is.

And based on that initial assessment, they decide on their course of action. It doesn’t matter that they might actually get to really like the person they are rejecting if they got to know him/her better, they just go with their initial intuition which is crazy really since often times they have been married in the first place.

Dating, and online dating is difficult. It’s not an easy task to find a partner, a soul mate, a companion to spend a life time with, or at least some of it. For the sake for sanity, let us not make it any more difficult then it already is.

T’is tough to date nowayday.

69 Interesting Dating Facts

The dating facts haven’t been made up but came from reputable sources and been researched.

  1. 2% of Americans get married every year.
  2. 29% of breakups result from infidelity.
  3. 29% of woman spend more time looking for shoes than a life long partner.
  4. 31% of adults in America say they know someone who has used an online dating service and got married.
  5. 33% of women who have extramarital affairs consider their marriages to be happy, while 56% of men do
  6. 34% of women see a deposit on a home as a greater sign of commitment than an engagement ring (Woolwich survey)
  7. 40% of women think a man’s education is more important than his looks (Connexions Card Survey)
  8. 44% of all American adults are single.
  9. 44% of singles say 5 years is the biggest acceptable age gap in a relationship; 24% says 10 years; 8% say age doesn’t matter.
    • 47% are men and 53% are women.
  10. 49% of Americans know of someone who has found a date online. 28% know more than one person.
  11. 53% of people surveyed have admittedly dated more than one person at the same time.
  12. 58% of Europeans have been victims of online dating dishonesty. Italians at 72%, Germans at 58%, French and British at 55%, and Dutch at 48%.
  13. 6% of women are desperately searching for a mate.
    • 61% have never been married, 24% have been divorced at least once and, 15% are widowed.
  14. 71% believe in love at first sight.
  15. 71% of UK adults claim to have had an affair with a colleague (AOL survey)
  16. 8 out of 10 single believe that the first kiss gives a good sign of how the rest of the relationship will go.
  17. 8 out of 10 single people think the first kiss is a good indication of how the rest of the relationship will be.
  18. 88.7% of people said they are more likely to choose a dating site which offers mobile phone access.
  19. 92% of single parents rather date other single parents.
  20. According to Hitwise, there are about 1,400 online dating sites in North America.
  21. According to Marketdata Enterprises, the online dating industry generates $1.8 billion in revenue annually and the dating coach/matchmaker industry generates $260 million.
  22. According to Nielsen, online dating sites generating 27.5 million unique visitors in June, 2009.
  23. According to the U.S. Census there are now 95.9 million unmarried people in the U.S.
  24. Adult dating sites are blamed by some for causing the $1.2 billion sex industry to drop $74 million (-6%) in revenue this year.
  25. Estimated by 2011 there will be 15 million singles in the United Kingdom and the value of the dating industry at that point will be over £1billion (entire?).
  26. Every month 7 million UK singles visit a dating site. This is a 27% increase over last year.
  27. For every 100 single women in the U.S. there are 86 single men.
  28. For singles who use dating sites, 33% form a relationship, 33% do not, and 33% give up on dating online.
  29. For the lifetime, men on average would like to have 18 sex partners, and women, 4 or 5.
  30. In August the unemployment rate for married people in the United States was 6.3 percent. For single people it was 13.5 percent.
  31. In the UK there are 8 million singles. In 2008 they went on 24 million first dates with 69% being arranged through online dating and social networks
  32. In the UK, people married between the ages of 19 and 25, 20% met their spouse online. For all ages, the average is 15%.
  33. In the UK, singles aged 55 and older are the most active online daters. 62% have used a dating site and have gone out on average 8.2 dates and had 2.1 long term relationships. On average 2.4 sexual partners where also found.
  34. In the UK, the average internet relationship lasts 7 months.
  35. In the United Kingdom there was 115,200 divorces in 2008 with 29% the result of adulterous behavior.
  36. India – There is estimated 15 million online dating users in India.
  37. It is predicted that Americans will spend $1.7 billion on dating services in 2013.
  38. Japan – Over 1,600 dating sites registered in the first month of the new regulations law.
  39. Of the most important features looked for in a romantic partner, the top 3 are: personality (30%), sense of humor (14%), and smile (12%). Looks comes in 4th at 11%.
  40. On average a single person – male or female – will go out on 100 dates before getting married.
  41. On average, those paying for online dating services spend a total of $239 per year. (Source: Jupiter Research)
  42. Online Dating Magazine estimates that more than 20 million people visit at least one online dating service a month.
  43. Online Dating Magazine estimates that there are more than 120,000 marriages a year that occur as a result of online dating
  44. Online dating profiles with photos get more than twice as many responses as those without photos.
  45. Only 11% of men consider finding a life long partner their top priority.
  46. Only 9% of women and 2% of men find a relationship in a bar.
  47. Over 40 million of Americans participate in online dating.
  48. Overall the online dating industry is up this year but the related wedding industry (which is worth $60 billion) is down 24%
  49. Remarriage after death or divorce? In the US, 76% of women aged 14-19 remarry; 56% of women aged 30-39; 32% of women aged 40-49; and 12% of women aged 50-75
  50. Roughly 40 million American singles use online dating and social networking sites to meet new people
  51. Singles 50 plus have been increasingly using online dating sites over the last few years. Some dating sites are seeing a 30% increase in these members each year.
  52. Singles who are more likely to use dating sites are ones who are more sociable and have high self-esteem. They also put more value in romantic relationships.
  53. The #1 cause of divorce worldwide is infidelity.
  54. The #2 cause of divorce worldwide is infertility.
  55. The #3 cause of divorce worldwide is unkindness. This can take the form of emotional and/or physical abuse, and may be the result of infidelity and infertility, or it can be a personality characteristic that is stable over time, involving lack of consideration for others, cruelty, selfishness, and irresponsibility
  56. The average single–man or woman–will go on 100 dates before finding their life partner.
  57. The divorce rate among couples where the woman makes more than the man is 50% higher than among couples in which the husband earns more.
  58. The mobile phone dating market was worth $330 million in 2007, $550 million in 2008 and is predicted to double by 2013 to $1.3 billion.
  59. The third week in September is National Singles Week. Also may be called National Unmarried and Single Americans Week.
  60. There are 15 million singles in Britain. A third are looking for love online.
  61. There are 25,000 to 35,000 polygynous marriages in the U.S.,mostly in western states. The more polygynous the mating system the greater the differences between the sexes in terms of mortality. Polygynous mating selects for males who take risks. Risk-taking traits lead to successful mating at the expense of a long life, i.e., the biggest buck wins the mating-fight, but will have more trouble feeding himself in a lean winter.
  62. There was 65.8 million marriages last year in the United States.
  63. Visits to online dating sites in the United Kingdom grew 13%. This means there are now more than 5 million singles using UK dating sites. The gender split is 50 – 50 and 65% of online daters are over 35 years old or older.
  64. When asked the first thing they notice about their dates, looks (38%) was the number one answer.
  65. Who said ‘I love you’ first? – 63% of women say he did, while 37% admit they were first (Glamour Survey)
  66. With free dating sites, it is estimated that at least 10 percent of new accounts created each day are from scammers
  67. With singles over the age of 65 in the United Kingdom, 30% of men live alone and 60% of women live alone.
  68. Worldwide, wives who are less than 20 years old are more than twice as likely as women who are more than 20 to be killed by a husband in a jealous age, regardless of the age of the husband.
  69. Worldwide, women prefer to marry men who are older than they are and vice versa. In Finland, Sweden and Norway the man is 1-2 years older. In Nigeria, 6.5 years older. In Zambia, 7.5 years older. In the US, men in their 30s prefer a woman 5 years younger; in their 50s, a woman 10-20 years younger. In the US, on average in the first marriage, the man is 3 years older; in the second marriage 5 years older; in the third marriage, 8 years older

References: Where we found the Dating facts

  1. AOL
  2. Behind the Marriage Making Statistics of Dating Sites
  3. Did anyone notice that eHarmony Changed their TV Commercial Format?
  4. eHarmony Couples
  5. eHarmony Gender Ratio & Age Range
  6. eHarmony has Issued more than 1 Billion Matches
  7. eHarmony has Issued more than 1 Billion Matches
  8. eHarmony is Looking for a Customer Relations Risk Analyst
  9. eHarmony UK now Live with Free 90 Day Memberships
  10. eHarmony’s Revenue and Ad Spending
  11. Glamour Magazine
  12. How eHarmony Concluded, 236 Members get Married Everyday
  13. How Much did Dating Sites Spend on Ads in 2007?
  14. Jupter Research
  15. LA Business Journal
  16. Let’s Look at more eHarmony Site Metrics
  17. MyShape.com Partners with eHarmony
  18. VentureBeat

 

If there are dating facts you think we should know about please send them in.