Some user friendly websites that I have found for internet dating are as follows: POF.com, Singlesnet.com, and OK Cupid.

POF facts you may want to know more about

POF.com (Plenty of fish) offers a lot of free features that one you may find very enjoyable are the chemistry match questions, search, online chat, the meet me section where you can click on photos of available singles, and trying out the ultra match section for free.  I especially liked the chat section because you can go in ask members who have been there awhile what they think of the site and how they are approaching their online dating.  They were all really very honest about how they were addressing online dating and gave me some good tips on how to approach the site even though a lot of profiles held inactive members. Some of the features you can enjoy if you upgrade are extra mail storage, access to ultra match, quality photo upgrades, see if your emails are read, and experience the site ad free. Some slight disadvantages to the site are a lot of people you may write to are no longer single or available, and simply forgot to delete their profiles, and there are only 7 pictures you can post to the site as a non paying member. A great amount of time is spent getting to know who is and who is not really there, and some humans just don’t respond at all. This doesn’t it any easier in finding live bodies to correspond with.  It is still a wonderful, delightful site for what it is, with a lot going for it.

Singlesnet.com features you may want to dive into further

Singlesnet.com (not to be confused with singles.net) is a really great site. For the plus side on the features, you can chat with someone live, email the gold members (paying members) for free, set up your email, view member’s profiles, and do a proprietary match. Other cool features are the sending a free flirt, save a contact, and instant message chat request. You would not have to make a chat request if you decided to become a paying member. One very whimsical element to this site is that the site will tell you if this person is more of your match a friend, or an enemy depending on how they answered their profile questions. It’s so clear as to who you would want to avoid by just seeing this percentage, as well. Someone with a high level of enemy rating would most definitely not be a good love match for you.  Some benefits to becoming a paying member, automatic chats, not requests, your profile becomes a gold member profile and it stands out more to other members, and you can send an email to both gold and non-gold members. A not so easy to use feature is the log in feature. Whereas most sites have their log in feature to the far upper left or right side of the screen, this site chose to put their log in information far down below all other material, center, in very tiny letters. It is extremely hard to see the letters, too. It does finally take you onto another page with the bigger log on information, but that step just makes it more time consuming.

OK Cupid; little things you might want to check out more

The site OK Cupid really cracks me up, first the name, then this wonderful lady named Cupidista (Meghan) comes and welcomes you to the site in an email. She even gives you extra photo slots just for being an active member in good standing. Others things I like about the site are that you have up to about ten photo slots and you can select people to view by your preference list, and email people without paying a single dime out of your pocket.  There seems to be enough singles on the site to write to, and you can even upgrade and know who has put you on their A list, or get more saved messages (over 300).  A special section called “you might like” is embedded underneath your main profile picture, and is super simple to use. One drawback to the site is that sometimes you can’t find out where to delete an older photo.  I had to write to support about that one. I am still waiting on a reply back, but other than that, it is an enjoyable and user friendly site.

In courtship, as in life, you must make the best choices of what you feel is right for you, and who you will want to spend the rest of your life with. Here are some questions to help you make a better decision on your future soul mate.

Describe your relationship with your father and / or mother?
This is when you want to find out if someone was respectful, or obedient.  You want to take a look at the positive or negative view of their parent and figure out if you can live with this person, and his or her views regarding his or her respective parents. Find out the personal stories, and how those stories came to shape that person and his or her life.

How is self-centeredness portrayed in your life?
This is where the rubber meets the road. By asking this question you find out if your future wife or husband is self centered, and by how much? You want to discover if this person can actually be more outwardly focused when it comes to you, your needs, and understanding another’s perspective outside of him or herself.

In striving for self improvement, what personal gains would you like to achieve or improve on?
It’s asked when you see if the person has goals, and are they trying to achieve them. In another case, you could see if the person has a flaw that they are trying to work on. If all this checks out, then maybe you might want to help each other with your gains or personal aspirations.

Does your mother or father have mental problems that can affect the life of your future baby?
It may seem like a tough question to ask someone, but what’s even tougher is if you didn’t know your future spouse’s history and your baby is delivered with a non curable birth defect. No addressed it, so nothing could be done to try to minimize or prevent such an emotional situation. Everyone has the right to know if they biologically have a chance to have a healthy baby. Don’t let pride stand in front of an unborn child’s life.

What types of situations aid your frustration level and how do you diffuse it?
Once this kind of question is asked, you can begin to see if your mate gets easily frustrated, lightly frustrated, or nothing fazes him or her at all. Watch closely the way he or she talks to you after this particular question is delivered. The tone of voice, pitch, and length of the answer can leave an impression, too. This also lets you know if the person has the ability to problem solve when it comes to his or her emotions,

Do you feel you have a teachable spirit?
In this circumstance you find out if your partner can take criticism, learn from mistakes, and build upon new ideas. Would you really want someone who isn’t open to new ideas and learning new things in the long run? You need to know if this person can listen to what you say, even if you are critiquing them, accept the delivery of the message, positively reflect on it, then honestly be okay with what you stated.

Are you a member of a church or how long have you been attending church?
In asking this question, you find out if your mate attends church. Does your soul mate believe in God, or if he or she is an atheist (a non-believer). You could even discover more from this one question by asking if he or she serves in a ministry, and what are some of your partner’s other spiritual beliefs?

Dating in a Struggling Economy

By Angie Peckham

Everyone wants love.  It’s a simple fact of life.  We like the idea of someone finding us so amazing that they’d rather be spending time with us than doing almost anything else (not that I can actually think of anything anyone would rather do than spend time with us, but you know the opposite sex – they’re slippery).

The point is, we are addicted to our mating ritual.  We crave the butterflies we feel at the beginning of a relationship.  We anticipate that first kiss and making sure the pheromones are all working the way they should be.  We dream about settling into a gentle game of playing house once the initial excitement has abated.  We love being in love.

Finding that special person to happily fall asleep with and slowly wake up with is complicated enough without the economy throwing us a curveball.  So what are we, the poor, the struggling, the unemployed to do?  Are we to sit at home in the dark, getting more and more depressed, isolated from workday human interaction and denied the experience of feeling those butterflies and playing house?

Some might think that if you are unemployed, you should not be out having fun at all.  They believe that you must spend all of your waking hours on your job search.  These people are normally amongst the employed.  We don’t like them.  What those naysayers fail to realize is that you need the human interaction.  You need the emotional and intellectual stimulation, dangit, and you need to get out and see the world once in awhile.

What you may not recognize, while you’re sitting around moping and eating everything in your fridge out of boredom, is that a struggling economy can actually be a blessing in disguise.  Just think – now you can date people with irregular schedules.

You know that fireman you’ve noticed when you’re out doing your grocery shopping?  The one with the shiny red truck and the large hose?  He has an irregular schedule, and now, you have a schedule perfectly suited to dating him.  The hot blonde behind the bar with the tight top and the great assets?  Guess what time she gets off work?  You don’t have to get up in the morning.  Therefore, you can handle her schedule, and then, if you’re lucky, her assets.  Think police, wait staff, DJ’s, musicians.  Your being unemployed has suddenly opened up an entirely new dating pool for you.

Now that you’re aware of the unemployment bright side, you need to figure out how to date on a limited budget.  This is the really sucky reality of unemployed dating, but it can be done.  Here are some things to keep in mind:

Be Honest – Be up front about your situation with potential dates.  If you have an online dating profile, make it clear that you are currently a victim of the economy, but that you are excited about your prospects for the future.  You will inevitably be asked what you do for a living if you meet someone in a social situation.  Have an answer ready.  Lucky for you, the economy is bad all the way around.  A lot of people have lost their jobs, and everyone knows someone who has been affected, so there are a lot of understanding and sympathetic people out there.

Don’t Spend – It’s very hard to be a social butterfly if you don’t have the cash to do so.  Do you have friends who play in a band or work in a bar or nightclub?  Have them put you “on the list.”  This allows you to get in for free and possibly meet someone new.  If you’re a guy, the pressure to buy someone you’ve met a drink can feel overwhelming, so decide ahead of time if this is the kind of outing you’re going to have.  If you’re a girl, you’re a little luckier, as someone will likely buy you a drink at some point.  Only attend free events.  Concerts in the park, exploration of the city, throwing some darts, going on a hike – all of these are fun, interactive and free or virtually free.

Even buying the gas to get to an event can be a struggle, so factor that into your costs when planning outings, and if you’re the one dating a financially struggling person, keep in mind the cost of having them come to you.

Get Active – We are no good to anyone else if we aren’t being good to ourselves.  The worst thing you can do for yourself when you lose your job is hide out in your house.  If you were on an exercise regimen before your situation changed, keep it up.  In fact, now’s the time to step it up.  You get to enjoy the gym when nobody else is there.  You get the bike paths to yourself.  You can go running at 11:00pm if you like.  It doesn’t matter what you choose.  Just choose something.  If you feel good about yourself, that vibe will carry and you will attract others.

Have Fun – When you’re out on a date, keep the conversation light and have fun.  Try to forget your troubles for a little while and enjoy the company you’re with.  Who knows?  Maybe you’ll end up seeing a lot more of them.