What You Didn’t Want To Hear About Cheating & Relationships – The Hard Stats

Who hasn’t dated someone who has  been caught cheating? Before you think it only happens to you read this.

Cheating Facts

What the Therapists Say  about Cheating– Two Different Opinions

Approximately 40% of men seek sexual satisfaction outside their relationships, estimates Kat Hertlein, Ph.D., professor of human development at the University of Nevada – Las Vegas and a marriage and family therapist.

About 60 percent of men and 40 percent of women will have an affair at some point in some marriage “Monogamy Myth”, Therapist Peggy Vaugn


What Government Studies Says About Cheating

That number hasn’t changed much since 1950, when the famous Kinsey sex study found that 50% of U.S. men cheat at some point in their marriages.

 

Who Admits to Cheating – Men Versus Women

According to Men’s Health Best Life 2003 study on 5% of men admit they are cheating. Which leaves 35% denying it.

According to Men’s Health Best Life 2003 study 4.55% of women admit cheating a year later another study done by Oprah Magazine concluded 15% of women cheat.

 

The Wedding Ring

1 in 3 men take off their wedding rings when out alone without their wives – Study Divorce Peers

 

Rise in Cheating Women – They Are Catching Up to Men Standards

As women become more financially independent, women are starting to act more like men with respect to infidelity

 

I Will Never Get Caught Cheating– Think Again.

If you are male don’t think you will get caught because 80% of you will according to Divorce Peers Study.


Why Did You Do It?  Weren’t You Rationally Thinking?

The initial decision to be unfaithful is rarely ever a rational choice; instead infidelity is usually driven by circumstances and one’s emotions. In fact, most people are surprised by their own behavior at the start of an affair 

 

Does Age Matter When it Comes to Cheating?

Younger people are more likely candidates; in fact, younger women are as likely as younger men to be unfaithful. According to Wallstreet Journal Study Infidelity is becoming more common among people under 30. Many experts believe this increase in cheating is due to greater opportunity (time spent away from a spouse) and young people developing the habit of having multiple sexual partners before they get married

 

Can a Marriage Be Saved After One Cheats?

The good thing 64% of couples preserves their marriage after an affair. However 78% of couples who remain married despite the affair later describe the marriage as unhappy and empty – Study Divorce Peers

 

Lower Then You Think

17 percent of divorces in the United States are caused by infidelity.


Don’t Feel Like a Fool
You Are Not Alone When it Comes to Cheating

70 percent of married women and 54 percent of married men did not know of their spouses’ extramarital activity. There are no definitive “signs of cheating.” But, in hindsight you will always find them.

 

Who Is Your Daddy?

Research consistently shows that 2 to 3% of all children are the product of infidelity. And most of these children are unknowingly raised by men who are not their biological fathers. DNA testing is finally making it easy for people to check the paternity of their children

 


Cheating Political Leaders

50 percent of Americans say President Clinton’s adultery makes his moral standard “about the same as the average married man,” according to a Time-CNN poll.

Ironically With All the Stats Above
90% of Americans believe adultery is morally wrong

This article is dedicated to the man who cheated on me while I was at my grandmothers funeral. At the end his cheating was a blessing.

 

Postive Affirmations For Love

There are days we just need to keep positive and not cast doubt!!
Below are some great positive affirmations in beliving in your self worth,  betting your self esteem, thinking postive about your  relationship and that you are worthy of having a postive healthy relationship.

  • I accept people as they are.
  • I admire and respect my partner because …
  • I allow love to find me
  • I am a good friend; I deserve good friends
  • I am all that I allow myself to be
  • I am an attractive, happy person
  • I am enthusiastic
  • I am full of grace.
  • I am fully receptive and appreciative for all the love that my partner showers upon me.
  • i am in a beautiful relationship with a person who truly loves me
  • I am in a loving and passionate relationship
  • I am love, loved and loving.
  • I am now in an ideal relationship with my perfect partner
  • I am receptive to my partner’s romantic advances.
  • I am receptive.
  • I am treating those I love the most with love and respect
  • I attract only healthy relationships
  • I can and do what I put my mind, heart and soul into therefore I am
  • I deserve to be loved fully and completely
  • I give out Love and it is returned to me multiplied
  • I greatly admire and respect my partner for all that they are.
  • I have a wonderful partner and we are both happy and at peace
  • I know that I deserve Love and accept it now
  • I love myself and naturally attract Loving relationships into my life.
  • I make friends easily wherever I go
  • I possess great inner-strength.
  • I rejoice in the Love I encounter everyday
  • I release any desperation and allow love to find me
  • I release any desperation and allow love to find me; I attract only healthy relationships
  • I release excessive control. I live positively and let live in a positive relationship.
  • I release the pain of my unpleasant experiences in love
  • I verbalize my respect and admiration for my partner daily.
  • My energy blends perfectly and beautifully with my partner’s energy.
  • my perfect love partner and I are together in mind, body, and spirit
  • My relationship is filled with love, passion, understanding and fun
  • My relationship is strong, filled with love and trust

69 Interesting Dating Facts

The dating facts haven’t been made up but came from reputable sources and been researched.

  1. 2% of Americans get married every year.
  2. 29% of breakups result from infidelity.
  3. 29% of woman spend more time looking for shoes than a life long partner.
  4. 31% of adults in America say they know someone who has used an online dating service and got married.
  5. 33% of women who have extramarital affairs consider their marriages to be happy, while 56% of men do
  6. 34% of women see a deposit on a home as a greater sign of commitment than an engagement ring (Woolwich survey)
  7. 40% of women think a man’s education is more important than his looks (Connexions Card Survey)
  8. 44% of all American adults are single.
  9. 44% of singles say 5 years is the biggest acceptable age gap in a relationship; 24% says 10 years; 8% say age doesn’t matter.
    • 47% are men and 53% are women.
  10. 49% of Americans know of someone who has found a date online. 28% know more than one person.
  11. 53% of people surveyed have admittedly dated more than one person at the same time.
  12. 58% of Europeans have been victims of online dating dishonesty. Italians at 72%, Germans at 58%, French and British at 55%, and Dutch at 48%.
  13. 6% of women are desperately searching for a mate.
    • 61% have never been married, 24% have been divorced at least once and, 15% are widowed.
  14. 71% believe in love at first sight.
  15. 71% of UK adults claim to have had an affair with a colleague (AOL survey)
  16. 8 out of 10 single believe that the first kiss gives a good sign of how the rest of the relationship will go.
  17. 8 out of 10 single people think the first kiss is a good indication of how the rest of the relationship will be.
  18. 88.7% of people said they are more likely to choose a dating site which offers mobile phone access.
  19. 92% of single parents rather date other single parents.
  20. According to Hitwise, there are about 1,400 online dating sites in North America.
  21. According to Marketdata Enterprises, the online dating industry generates $1.8 billion in revenue annually and the dating coach/matchmaker industry generates $260 million.
  22. According to Nielsen, online dating sites generating 27.5 million unique visitors in June, 2009.
  23. According to the U.S. Census there are now 95.9 million unmarried people in the U.S.
  24. Adult dating sites are blamed by some for causing the $1.2 billion sex industry to drop $74 million (-6%) in revenue this year.
  25. Estimated by 2011 there will be 15 million singles in the United Kingdom and the value of the dating industry at that point will be over £1billion (entire?).
  26. Every month 7 million UK singles visit a dating site. This is a 27% increase over last year.
  27. For every 100 single women in the U.S. there are 86 single men.
  28. For singles who use dating sites, 33% form a relationship, 33% do not, and 33% give up on dating online.
  29. For the lifetime, men on average would like to have 18 sex partners, and women, 4 or 5.
  30. In August the unemployment rate for married people in the United States was 6.3 percent. For single people it was 13.5 percent.
  31. In the UK there are 8 million singles. In 2008 they went on 24 million first dates with 69% being arranged through online dating and social networks
  32. In the UK, people married between the ages of 19 and 25, 20% met their spouse online. For all ages, the average is 15%.
  33. In the UK, singles aged 55 and older are the most active online daters. 62% have used a dating site and have gone out on average 8.2 dates and had 2.1 long term relationships. On average 2.4 sexual partners where also found.
  34. In the UK, the average internet relationship lasts 7 months.
  35. In the United Kingdom there was 115,200 divorces in 2008 with 29% the result of adulterous behavior.
  36. India – There is estimated 15 million online dating users in India.
  37. It is predicted that Americans will spend $1.7 billion on dating services in 2013.
  38. Japan – Over 1,600 dating sites registered in the first month of the new regulations law.
  39. Of the most important features looked for in a romantic partner, the top 3 are: personality (30%), sense of humor (14%), and smile (12%). Looks comes in 4th at 11%.
  40. On average a single person – male or female – will go out on 100 dates before getting married.
  41. On average, those paying for online dating services spend a total of $239 per year. (Source: Jupiter Research)
  42. Online Dating Magazine estimates that more than 20 million people visit at least one online dating service a month.
  43. Online Dating Magazine estimates that there are more than 120,000 marriages a year that occur as a result of online dating
  44. Online dating profiles with photos get more than twice as many responses as those without photos.
  45. Only 11% of men consider finding a life long partner their top priority.
  46. Only 9% of women and 2% of men find a relationship in a bar.
  47. Over 40 million of Americans participate in online dating.
  48. Overall the online dating industry is up this year but the related wedding industry (which is worth $60 billion) is down 24%
  49. Remarriage after death or divorce? In the US, 76% of women aged 14-19 remarry; 56% of women aged 30-39; 32% of women aged 40-49; and 12% of women aged 50-75
  50. Roughly 40 million American singles use online dating and social networking sites to meet new people
  51. Singles 50 plus have been increasingly using online dating sites over the last few years. Some dating sites are seeing a 30% increase in these members each year.
  52. Singles who are more likely to use dating sites are ones who are more sociable and have high self-esteem. They also put more value in romantic relationships.
  53. The #1 cause of divorce worldwide is infidelity.
  54. The #2 cause of divorce worldwide is infertility.
  55. The #3 cause of divorce worldwide is unkindness. This can take the form of emotional and/or physical abuse, and may be the result of infidelity and infertility, or it can be a personality characteristic that is stable over time, involving lack of consideration for others, cruelty, selfishness, and irresponsibility
  56. The average single–man or woman–will go on 100 dates before finding their life partner.
  57. The divorce rate among couples where the woman makes more than the man is 50% higher than among couples in which the husband earns more.
  58. The mobile phone dating market was worth $330 million in 2007, $550 million in 2008 and is predicted to double by 2013 to $1.3 billion.
  59. The third week in September is National Singles Week. Also may be called National Unmarried and Single Americans Week.
  60. There are 15 million singles in Britain. A third are looking for love online.
  61. There are 25,000 to 35,000 polygynous marriages in the U.S.,mostly in western states. The more polygynous the mating system the greater the differences between the sexes in terms of mortality. Polygynous mating selects for males who take risks. Risk-taking traits lead to successful mating at the expense of a long life, i.e., the biggest buck wins the mating-fight, but will have more trouble feeding himself in a lean winter.
  62. There was 65.8 million marriages last year in the United States.
  63. Visits to online dating sites in the United Kingdom grew 13%. This means there are now more than 5 million singles using UK dating sites. The gender split is 50 – 50 and 65% of online daters are over 35 years old or older.
  64. When asked the first thing they notice about their dates, looks (38%) was the number one answer.
  65. Who said ‘I love you’ first? – 63% of women say he did, while 37% admit they were first (Glamour Survey)
  66. With free dating sites, it is estimated that at least 10 percent of new accounts created each day are from scammers
  67. With singles over the age of 65 in the United Kingdom, 30% of men live alone and 60% of women live alone.
  68. Worldwide, wives who are less than 20 years old are more than twice as likely as women who are more than 20 to be killed by a husband in a jealous age, regardless of the age of the husband.
  69. Worldwide, women prefer to marry men who are older than they are and vice versa. In Finland, Sweden and Norway the man is 1-2 years older. In Nigeria, 6.5 years older. In Zambia, 7.5 years older. In the US, men in their 30s prefer a woman 5 years younger; in their 50s, a woman 10-20 years younger. In the US, on average in the first marriage, the man is 3 years older; in the second marriage 5 years older; in the third marriage, 8 years older

References: Where we found the Dating facts

  1. AOL
  2. Behind the Marriage Making Statistics of Dating Sites
  3. Did anyone notice that eHarmony Changed their TV Commercial Format?
  4. eHarmony Couples
  5. eHarmony Gender Ratio & Age Range
  6. eHarmony has Issued more than 1 Billion Matches
  7. eHarmony has Issued more than 1 Billion Matches
  8. eHarmony is Looking for a Customer Relations Risk Analyst
  9. eHarmony UK now Live with Free 90 Day Memberships
  10. eHarmony’s Revenue and Ad Spending
  11. Glamour Magazine
  12. How eHarmony Concluded, 236 Members get Married Everyday
  13. How Much did Dating Sites Spend on Ads in 2007?
  14. Jupter Research
  15. LA Business Journal
  16. Let’s Look at more eHarmony Site Metrics
  17. MyShape.com Partners with eHarmony
  18. VentureBeat

 

If there are dating facts you think we should know about please send them in.

The Only One Secret to Dating You Will Ever Need.


Dating Tips

The current day and age, navigating the confusing and often contradictory world of dating rituals can be an intimidating and frustrating experience.

“Never call a man”, “Don’t ask a woman out, get her to ask you”, “Play hard to get”, “Tease her with small insults”, “Cook him a big meal”, “Don’t be too nice to her” and infamous “3 date” or “Two month” or “Six month” rules that schedule events as simple as “when to kiss”, “when to take a vacation together”, “when to propose”, etc. have ruined the spontanaeity and fun of dating. “Do this, don’t do that”. Whatever happened to the REAL purpose of dating: to get to know another individual, to let time take its course and fall in love (for how can someone not fall in love with anyone they enjoy spending time with and learn to appreciate?), and finally enjoying the feeling of being in love and being loved? Unfortunately, American dating rituals and modern customs have made this last, but seminal point of the whole ordeal: to meet and get to know someone you will want to love, almost moot.

Many advice columns and books tell you that if you follow certain rules or tactics, you can make yourself attractive to the opposite sex almost independent of who you are. While I believe it is true that looks is not a very important consideration when you’re looking for the love of your life (he or she may not come in the package you expected), what most advice columns and “dating method” tricks ignore is that you cannot magically make yourself attractive to another and build a healthy relationship with someone if

a) you are an uninteresting person on your own,

b) your life is not together, or

c) the other person’s personality clashes with yours.

In the case where you and your date’s personality clash, well, there’s nothing either one of you can do about it, so it is good to keep in mind when the dating process eventually arrives to its inevitable conclusion. But in this case you’ve both gained something out of the experience: you’ve met and gotten to know someone, and you’ve learned about yourself. If you handle things properly and the personalities are not insidiously incompatible you may have even won a friend. It is just a part of dating.

But in the case of items a) and b), you should ask yourself if this is the REAL reason you are unsuccessful at dating. Perhaps it has nothing to do with whether you called her on a Monday or a Tuesday. Perhaps it is not whether you cooked him fish instead of chicken for dinner on the 3rd date instead of the 5th date. But if you think about it, all your actions–when/if you call, whether you buy her flowers or a card, whether you pick her up or she meets you somewhere, whether you treat her with respect or tease her with insults, whether you kiss him, sleep with him, or just hug him,what you do and where you go during your dates, etc, ALL OF THIS, is a reflection of both of those items.

Is your life not together? Are you unemployed and can’t invite your date out to an activity that you will both enjoy? Do you have other commitments at home that require you to limit the time you have available for dates or cancel them while they are going on? Do you feel unhappy about where your life is going at this point in time? Are you in the process of moving away to some other location? Are you new in town? All of these circumstances and situations will affect how you date, and your personal situation will sooner or later become evident to the person you’re dating. If you’ve been smart enough to choose someone worthwhile to date, who has the same goals in dating as yourself (we’re assuming the only real purpose of dating is what we stated at the beginning: to meet and find someone to love), then when you don’t have your life in order they will immediately realize that investing in a long term relationship with you is probably a risky prospect. Many people might decide not to get further involved with you if this is the case.

Are you an uninteresting person? Are you negative, sarcastic, or a general buzz kill? Do you have angry outbursts? Are you selfish? (selfishness is the biggest turnoff for women, while neediness seems to be the biggest turnoff for men). Or perhaps you don’t have any serious personality flaws but your life revolves around work and TV (or work and videogames, which seems to be the Bay Area equivalent!). Do you have fun hobbies that someone else (i.e. your date) might like to learn about or share? Do you have an exciting social life that your date might want to participate in? Are you happy? It goes without saying that throughout the dating process both sexes evaluate what the other person brings to the relationship. If you are unable to contribute in an amount equal to what your date brings, chances are the relationship won’t go very far.

“Well, alright, these are all good points, but how does that help me when dating?” you might ask. Well, the biggest secret to dating is –that there is just one secret. And this one secret is this: Are you happy? It is this question that encompasses all of those items a, b, and c. above. If you are a genuinely, unhesistatingly, and enthusiastically happy, you’ll be an irresistible date. Everybody likes to be around positive, high-energy people who are confident and content with where their life is at the moment. Rules will suddenly not matter, because if you’re happy you’ll have the confidence to break or follow conventions and rituals according to what feels right for the situation. If you are happy, too, you will know when to let go of dates or situations that are draining, unhealthy, or are not leading you to where you want to go.

O.K., I forgot. There IS another little secret. And it is this: date only happy people. Yes, they are rare (because many people say that they are happy when everything in their life reflects that they aren’t), but when you find one, and you are happy too, I guarantee you that your dating experience will be all that it was always meant to be: wonderful.

by TechieGirl

The Best Way to Break Up with Someone


Romance can fade and love stories can turn into nightmares. This is the reality of life. But many people still find it hard to amicably break up with someone. If you’re currently not satisfied with the relationship you’re in and you’re thinking of ending it soon, here are a few for establishing the best way to break up with someone.

The best way to break up is usually through an in-person heart-to-heart talk. Whether you do this in public or in private is up to you.

Remember, you need to be firm with your decision to break up and stick with it. Don’t let it drag on for days and weeks as this could cause more friction between you two. If you’re a hundred percent decided on ending relationship, then let the person know.

Be honest with your reasons on why you think you’re both better off apart. You have to remember that no matter how long the duration of the relationship was, you still shared a special feeling with that person. And the least that person could hope for is the real reason why you’re breaking up.

Finally, be optimistic for the both of you. You should accept that the relationship has ended but know that you will still find love in other people. By knowing this, you both will be able to move on with no excess baggage and bitterness.

Now that you know these tips on ending relationship, you can become a better person and end the relationship in a good fashion. It will definitely save you all the drama in the long run.

Do you really want to know the best way to break up with someone? ?